i have a job
it's okay, but I dunno
i'm so socially awkward it's very difficult for me to talk to customers even though I'm outgoing????
When I'm not at work I am so violently bored that I don't know what to do with myself, so I eat and watch TV
I always wake up with the idea that today I'll eat healthy and exercise, but I don't have any motivation when I stand up. I just get really bored and gain weight ugh.
And I can't eat healthy because when there's bad food in the house then I have to eat it
it's a compulsion.
And since my mom is a huge dinner person dinner is always unhealthy and terrible (but so delicious)
I'm just so tired
I'm always tired
I've been going to bed at like 9:30 because I don't know what else to do
I can't seem to focus on anything anymore and I'm always bored without motivation ugh
AND THERE IS NOTHING TO DO IN THIS SMALL LITTLE TOWN OH MY GOD
oh and I graduated two weeks agO????
it was stupid and boring
they spelled my name wrong in the program
Stephanie LEANNE???? Cavanaugh
curse u mr. mcconkey
i also got an honors certificate it's cool
AND MY DAD FORGOT MY GRADUATION BC HE THOUGHT IT WAS A WEEK EARLIER.
he still came but wowowow father of the year
also i hate him
he uses me as a trophy to send pics of to his family to say 'hey look at this daughter that I
have raised and she's great because of me
.' which is bullshit bc he's done nothing in my life but hurt me
also if he doesn't pay for college lol I'm kicking him out of my life hella
my mom is happy about it but she asked me if I'd be okay without my dad walking me down the aisle and I said "hell yeah, I wouldn't have invited him anyways."
I didn't even want him at my graduation ugh
I choose my classes for college next week oh my god
I also meet my roomie <333
I can't wait for college
No but I'm also upset because mario cart wii no longer has wifi games?????
wtf is this bullshit my wii is worth negative three dollars now
i had a very weird dream where my english teacher made us eat butter and popcorn separately im very confused
i think there were zombies, an ap exam, and a lot of seniors
i wish i could remember it bc it was a gr8 dream
Lana Del Rey's new album tho <3333
im sorry im just so bored
OH OH OH OH OHHHH
I WENT TO A STYX/FOREIGNER/DON FELDER CONCERT
thank u based god it was amazing love love love
shout out to lawrence sassiest-pianist-ever gowan, tommy cutest-hippie shaw & kelly man-whore hansen
we sat in the SIXTH ROW
OH MY GOD
domo arigato mr. roboto <33
um i'm still very bored plz send help
i went to the doctors and i had a new doctor and she was very nice and I told her more than I've told any doctor
i mean of course i didn't say "yes" when she asked if I cut, self-harmed, or contemplated suicide, but I told her I had been depressed before.
(lol my mom wasn't there that's why)
she said that depression is two weeks (or more) of less/more sleep, uninterested in things I used to like, and avoiding going out or talking to people I used to always talk with
is that me now?
I'm avoiding everyone I used to talk to on facebook because I don't feel like talking to them
I never talk to people first.
I'm sleeping far more than usual
and I don't go out much except for work
and i don't go out without make-up
and I'm too lazy to put it on without a long-term reason (four hour shift)
also everything bores me
i used to read but it's so hard for me now
i literally spent all day watching How I Met Your Mother and playing Candy Crush and when I got bored of that I read my workers manual
it's driving me insane
I haven't even looked at my poems in like two weeks
nothing interests me anymore oh my god
like i wanna go out but I work everyday at inconvenient hours aka the afternoon
this is a part-time job too wtf
send help or inspiration thank u
hope you all are doing relatively well i'm okay
i wish I could sleep longer than 9 hours
or during the day